Digital Childhood Script Series
"Everyone else has Snapchat."
What to say
Validate the feeling first
"I know limiting this can leave you feeling left out, and that part is real. I'm not going to pretend it isn't, because it's true and it matters."
Name what Snapchat actually is now
"A teen told me once, if you don't have Snapchat, you don't always know when people are hanging out. Plans aren't always made at school anymore, they're made on apps. So the app isn't really the point, what you actually want is to know what everyone's doing, and I get that."
Give them a way in
"So here's where we land. It's a not yet, not a no forever. And in the meantime let's make sure you can actually reach your friends without it, so pick a few of them and let's get their numbers into your phone tonight, and you can text them or call them whenever you want. Have them over on the weekend. If you're finding out about something too late, tell me which thing you missed and we'll work out how to fix that one."
What not to say
"Because I said so." or "You're too young." Both of these end the conversation before it starts.
Why this matters
The "everyone" argument is designed to make you feel like the odd one out. The Younger kids version names that dynamic without dismissing their real feelings.
Follow-up questions
- "Which of your friends actually has it, can you name them?"
- "What would you use it for most?"