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Digital Habits

"I'm bored. Can I just watch something?"

What to say

Start here

"I love that you've got free time. That's what an afternoon like this is for, and I'm not going to fill it up for you."

Then say this

"Being bored for a bit is fine, and it's usually what happens right before you come up with something good. The reason it feels unbearable now is that YouTube is one tap away and it never lets you get there. Give it ten minutes before you open anything and see what you come up with."

Give them somewhere to go

"Go ride your bike, or go see if anyone's home down the street, or build something in the living room. If you're still stuck in ten minutes come find me and we'll think of something together, and I mean that, I'm not going to just tell you to figure it out."

What not to say

"There's nothing to do, so go watch something." Handing over a device the second boredom shows up teaches them that boredom is an emergency. It isn't. It's the doorway to the stuff they'll actually remember.

Why this matters

It's one of the most common things kids say all summer long, and it makes sense, because a device is easy and boredom is uncomfortable. But boredom is also where imagination lives. It's the feeling right before they come up with something they'll still be talking about in ten years, the fort, the game, the neighborhood adventure. You don't have to say no to a device forever. You just don't have to say yes to it first.

Follow-up questions

Calm guidance for raising kids in a digital world.

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